Hoka 10k 2018

Hoka 10k 2018

Tuesday, August 13, 2013

The Most Uncomfortable Situation I've Ever Been In

Ok...I'm about to share my feelings about something in which I'm trying to educate myself. This is not meant to offend anyone. I'm simply seeking/pursuing thoughts and education on the topic of breastfeeding.
 
For my birth class, we were asked to attend a Le Leche League meeting. It's a breastfeeding group of sorts that meets once a month. It provides education and experiences related to breastfeeding. I was initially excited to attend since I plan to breastfeed and know nothing about it.
 
I went in excited and left balling my eyes out...
 
The atmosphere was all wrong for me: new place I've never been, women I don't know, and other peoples' kids. As some of you may know, I can be slow when it comes to developing relationships with other women. As more of you may know, I don't like strangers' kids. If you're family, I love your child...If I know you, I might like your child...If you are a stranger, it's not likely that I like your child. You get the point.
 
So we've established that, upon my arrival, I'm experiencing slight social anxiety. This specific month, the group was addressing nutrition while breastfeeding and weaning from breastfeeding your child. As the mothers were sharing their experiences, I looked over and saw that a lady was breastfeeding her 2 year old. It totally freaked me out. Let me say this, breastfeeding in public does not bother me. It was the fact that this boy looked like a little man and he was still sucking his mom's boob that freaked me out. I've just never witnessed it before and I've never known anyone to breastfeed a child that long. As other moms shared, this seemed to be a pretty common theme in the room...one mom even did it until her child was 4 years old.
 
This was so shocking to me that I could feel that my face was red, my jaw was dropped...or maybe I looked as pale as a ghost. I don't know. I just knew I felt overwhelmed. The women were kind and encouraging me to come to the next meeting...I just don't know if I can do it. As soon as I stepped out of the building, I started balling my eyes out. I felt like something was wrong with me and just prayed that God would provide me knowledge. I honestly was grossed out by hearing stories of older children still nursing and it freaked me out. I pray that this doesn't keep me from wanting to breastfeed Baby Boo. I understand it's benefits but don't understand why it's beneficial for that amount of time. I'm hoping a good nights rest will cure my emotions.

1 comment:

  1. :( Aww, I'm so sorry you had that experience! But you're right--it probably was a lot of other things going on too.
    Extended breastfeeding is totally not a decision you have to make right now! Or you can, but just be open to change. That's totally what parenting is. Even now, as I thought I knew the way I would discipline (haha), I'm finding myself having to adjust all over the place because sometimes what you think and what actually is is totally different!
    Don't be discouraged, girl! You can do this. :)

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