After the race mishap last Saturday, I was very lackadaisical about the whole thing. Although I felt confident and firm in my decision to QUIT, earning my first DNF, my emotions were all over the place. I was bummed about no BQ, happy about potential pregnancy, sad that it happened that way....the list goes on. Part of me wanted to run 16 miles when I got home to complete my mileage for the day, but part of me wanted to crawl up into a ball and do nothing. Maybe I just wanted to forget the whole thing all together.
On my way home, crazy Amanda texted me a screen shot of the Memphis Marathon (I've done this half before and it was a neat race). She talked about how we should do it to give me another shot. I reminded her that, if I'm not pregnant, it would be my period weekend again. We all know that the period hasn't treated me well the past 3 months or so. I refused to put myself through that again. It was almost like I'd be setting myself up for failure on purpose.
A few minutes later, she sent me a screen shot of another race...The Veterans Marathon in Columbia City, IN. Columbia City?! Where the crap is that?! She pleaded her case:
- It's only 3 hours away!
- You won't have to take off work!
- Hotels are CHEAP!
- It's NEXT WEEKEND!
- I will pace you so it will feel like a training run!
- It's a USATF certified course and a Boston qualifier!
I'm sure she knew what I was thinking and the emotions I was feeling. She told me to think about it and pray about it. "You don't have to make a decision until Nov 12th at noon!" I knew I wouldn't make a decision that day...or even the next day. It just wouldn't be a fair decision. It would be a decision based on emotion. Plus, I wanted to get my feet on the road to see how my body felt before making that decision.
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Of course, I presented this information to the hubs because he heard me laughing out loud about it when Amanda would text me occasionally. We didn't discuss it in detail but he knew of the conversation.
Sunday rolled around and the topic came up on our way to church. My husband asked if I wanted his honest opinion. I don't remember saying "Yes," but he told me anyway. He encouraged me to do it, saying that he would not be satisfied if this happened to him. I took his words into consideration and decided later that day that I was 90% there but that other 10% was very strong and I needed one more day to decide. I spent the evening researching the details of the race to help shape my decision.
Amanda texted me that evening and said "I've booked our hotel! Let me know when you decide what you want to do!" Ha!!!!
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Monday morning, I received a text from Theresa that says her and Dani need to have a conference call with me and gave me two time slots. I told her I had a busy day and asked what it was concerning. She said, and I quote, "It is very important. No bullshit. I have meetings today too but pulling out. I can do now if you can. Please advise." So professional...yet, not professional at the same time!!!
When I got on the phone with them, T explained that her and Dani spent Sunday's run (and some time afterwards) talking about and researching possible marathons for me to run. She told me they found one for me to do (Veterans Marathon) in Indiana and it was a BQ course. She explained their plan to pay for the hotel, the registration fee...they were even going to babysit James so Jimmy didn't have to change his plans. I kept letting her talk but was laughing the whole time!
After she finished her spiel, all I could think to say was "So...I have a secret to tell you." I told them about the Amanda situation above. We all had a laugh, they gave me a pep talk, and I only had one thing left to do: finish contacting my immediate friend circle to include them on the secret. There were many people I wanted to tell but six people I knew I had to tell. People that have been with me directly through the past year and then some. I didn't even tell my family! I just didn't want the world to know. I wanted this to be as low key as possible.
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And so my week went on...another taper...another attempt at a BQ.
After she finished her spiel, all I could think to say was "So...I have a secret to tell you." I told them about the Amanda situation above. We all had a laugh, they gave me a pep talk, and I only had one thing left to do: finish contacting my immediate friend circle to include them on the secret. There were many people I wanted to tell but six people I knew I had to tell. People that have been with me directly through the past year and then some. I didn't even tell my family! I just didn't want the world to know. I wanted this to be as low key as possible.
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And so my week went on...another taper...another attempt at a BQ.
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